my everyday style: shoes made from recycled water bottles... and ALLLLL about self care!

I recently wrote a post on what a day in the life for me looks like as a blogger and a mother. That post was a super popular one and just simply outlined what a usual day looks like for me as I balance working for myself and the demands of motherhood as well. I have been self employed for over 10 years and each year, month and day is a constant evolution as my kids have grown up and I learn (and relearn) to balance it all. In that post I wrote about how I take some time to myself in the afternoons before the kids get home which sparked a conversation on how to "self care" no matter what stage you are at in motherhood on my Instagram Stories. As I wrote this post I realized that "self care" in motherhood often relates to time away from the kids or time to oneself. It's not that we don't like being with our kids, my personal opinion is that we are taking time to connect with ourselves as women. Taking time without the demands of motherhood for a brief moment in time helps me come back as a better person and mother and that's the vibe I got from you ladies too.

I asked fellow moms to chime in on how they took some time for themselves in the day and I LOVED hearing all the responses. There were a few negative Nelly's that commented "I don't have one minute to myself!" - which I know often FEELS the case when caring for children and balancing work and other commitments. But many of the comments also proved that even SMALL moments can feel like self care when in the right mindset.

Here are just a few ways I have done it over the years:

Baby - through toddler:
- sleep when they sleep! Go to bed early, take a nap when they nap... whatever you can do to get some extra rest was always a life saver for me!
- jogger rides! My husband loves to run and would take the babies (when they were old enough) in the jogger for runs. I got a short break and the baby usually came back sleeping so it was a win-win because I could get a shower or read a little without being interrupted.
- car rides! Both my kids slept great in the car. After a fussy afternoon or evening we would pop the littles in their car seats and roll down the windows to get that fresh air in their face and BOOM! They would be asleep. Then we would roll through the Steak N Shake drive thru for shakes for mom and dad.

Toddler through early grades:
- do 'at home' date night. We would take advantage of early bed times and eat dinner together with a movie at home. They will never go to bed this early again - so enjoy it!
- dedicated time with dad. My husband is a "do-er" on Saturdays - while I like to be lazy. It worked great because he would wake up early with them and go to the park, get donuts, and just get out of the house so I could have a quiet Saturday morning. Even if this isn't your husbands preference - take time to tell him you could use some quiet time or down time and he can make memories with the kids!
- dance parties! When the house is going to pot and the kids (and maybe mom too!) are all grumpy... turn on the music and dance it out! It's good for everyone!

Grade school through early teens:
- lunch dates with friends or on your own. Now that the after school period is so busy with kids a lot of my self care has to shift to during the day. Lunch with friends (or when I worked, lunch by myself in my car listening to music!) is a great way to sneak out and have some time away from work and family commitments for just me.
- evening baths. I usually want to go to bed before my kids at this point. But taking a break after dinner from the tv blaring and multiple FaceTime sessions going on in my living room is a great way to unwind after a busy day while blocking out motherhood duties for a while.

Teens and up:
- the extra free time can become almost intimidating at this point! It's exciting but also a little sad. And since I am not through this phase yet (I'm just entering it!) I'm still figuring this part out. This past winter I took up tennis and this has been great self care. It's physical activity, it's social, it challenges me and I am hoping it is a small thing I will do "just for me" for many years to come. But I definitely don't have this one figured out yet...

Now here are some of the great ideas you all had! I broke them down into categories depending on what amount of time or in some cases money you have on spending time to yourself - but MOST of these are completely FREE!

Mixing responsibilities with self care:
- Target alone.
- Walking the dog morning and evening with music and podcasts.
- Playing music (of my choosing!) while cooking and tidying the house.
- NO phone calls on the way to or from work. Just podcasts, music or quiet!

Get moving:
- 30 minute workouts 5-6 days a week.
- Barre class!
- walks with podcasts!
- workouts at the gym with free childcare!
- long walks with uplifting music.
- yoga and stretching
- going to the gym everyday
- short walks no matter what!
- running on my lunch hour

Simple things that are FREE:
- bubble baths!
- evening bath (lots of these!)
- Hallmark movies
- watching YouTube
- sitting on the porch with tea
- unscheduled Saturday mornings
- painting my nails at home
- coffee in the afternoon while kids sleep
- time on Instagram and coffee after kids go to school
- reading (lots of these!)
- sitting down and relaxing for 15 minutes before starting chores/dinner after work
- short afternoon naps
- putting the kids to bed early
- wake up before kids to read, journal, workout (lots of these!)
- daily devotional
- light a candle and watch Bravo
- reading with tea in the afternoon
- bookclub

Simple things that cost money (but are totally worth it, IMO!):
- therapy
- mani/pedis
- solid skincare routine
- massages
- retail therapy
- crafting

There are so many good suggestions here and what I love about almost all of them is that they are very ritualistic. Taking simple everyday activities and giving them weight and meaning and then doing it everyday. It's such a simple and beautiful thing and obviously the small things matter here! To sum up... I LOVED hearing from you guys on this. It was so inspiring that so many of you take your self-care seriously. And if you are in a time of life that is completely overwhelming - take heart that simple rituals and habits of investing in yourself can stack up big time! Plus, what great role models for our kids! It's important to show that giving ourselves time and space to be women and people, sometimes before being a mother, is meaningful and important.

~~~

And now for a super harsh pivot... haha! We just HAVE to talk about how these shoes are made from recycled water bottles. I'm kind of obsessed. It's like when a dress has pockets and you walk around telling everyone your dress has pockets! (wait, is that just me!?!) Any way, they are impressively comfortable and I kind of feel like I'm walking on air knowing that I rescued some water bottles from the ocean or the landfill. Ya know? (I obviously easily impress myself.) With jeans and a slouchy sweater they are perfect for bopping around town for errands and kids stuff. That's all I'm going to say... because this post is LONG. I'll let the photos tell the rest of the story. In short, this is my favorite kind of outfit - relaxed and comfy.